Only you can talk to your "self." Only I can only talk to my "self." While you can talk to me, you can not talk to my "self" and while I can talk to you, I can not talk to your "self." The only way I can know what you are talking to your "self" about and the only way you can know what I am talking to my "self" about is through dialogue, i.e., you sharing with me what you are talking to your "self" about and me sharing with you what I am talking to my "self" about. It is then possible for us both to find common identity (ground) in one another, in what we are talking to our "self" about, "building relationship" with one another upon the "self interests" we have in common, affirming one another's "self." The problem with "building relationship upon self interest" is for example, if you and a "friend" have the same "self interest" of finding gold and find it, you had better watch your back. Your "friends" "self interest" could cost you your life.
"Self" loves pleasure, which includes the pleasure which comes with affirmation, and hates pain, which includes the pain of rejection, Rejection is one of the most painful experiences of life. For the child pleasure is "good," and pain, which again includes the pain of missing out on pleasure, which again includes the pain of rejection is "bad." If the universe is "good" to us we are pleased. If it is "bad" to us, we are not happy and try to 'change' it in order to make it "good." When pleasure becomes the drive of life, the augmentation of it (pleasure) becomes the goal of life. Thus "doing right and not wrong" according to authority, which gets in the way of pleasure and involves pain, including the pain of missing out on pleasure (in order to "do right and not wrong"), becomes "bad."
When we talk to our "self" we are god, the center (purpose) of the universe (in our mind, i.e., in our eyes), figuring out how to create a world of "good," i.e., a world of pleasure for our "self." Doing "good works" for others does not make us "good." It only deceives us (and others) into believing that we are, i.e., our heart is "good." The truth is we (our heart) are "bad," i.e., "wicked," hating whatever (whoever) gets in the way of pleasure, including God, turning good into evil—making God "evil"—and evil into "good"—making our "self" god. When we remove God, the Father out of our life, who does know what we are talking to our "self" about, we (by nature) deceive our "self"—believing that we are "good" becoming god (in our eyes)—hating anyone, including God, who gets in our way, i.e., who prevents, i.e., inhibits or blocks us from"enjoying" the carnal pleasures of the 'moment' we desire, thus making us seducible, deceivably, and manipulatable, i.e., vulnerable to anyone who offers to "help" us fulfill it (our hearts desire). "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Jeremiah 17:9 "The transgression of the wicked saith within my heart, that there is no fear of God before his eyes. For he flattereth himself in his own eyes, until his iniquity be found to be hateful. The words of his mouth are iniquity and deceit: he hath left off to be wise, and to do good. He deviseth mischief upon his bed; he setteth himself in a way that is not good; he abhorreth not evil." Psalms 36:1-4
We talk to our "self" (privately) about our desires, i.e., what we are "enjoying" in the 'moment,' what we have "enjoyed" in the past, and/or what we hope to "enjoy" in the future. We also talk to our "self" (privately) about our dissatisfaction with what (or who) is keeping us from "enjoying" what we desire in the present, i.e., in the 'moment,' has kept us from "enjoying" what we desired in the past, and/or will keep us from "enjoying" what we desire (hope to have) in the future. We talk to your "self" privately because we do not want to be judged, condemned, and rejected for what we are thinking, loosing out on the pleasures we desire. It is the role of the facilitator of 'change' to create an environment where the fear of judgment, condemnation, and rejection, i.e., fear of God is missing (removed) from the room, in order for the gods to come to know one another—through the dialoguing of their opinions to a consensus becoming one god, united in the purpose of 'creating' a "new" world order "of and for self," i.e., of and for pleasure only.
The carnal nature of the child is to approach pleasure and avoid pain—loving pleasure and hating pain, including the pain which comes with missing out on pleasure, as well as the pain which comes with being rejected. A child left to his "self" is "self"-ish, thinking only of his "self," i.e., what he can get out of life for his "self" that is pleasurable. Despite the appearance, it is not the object of pleasure that the child is in love with, it is the pleasure the object engenders in him, in the 'moment,' that he is in love with. Thus the objects of the past that engendered pleasure in him in the past lose interest to him as he finds pleasure in the new things of the present, i.e., as his interests, i.e., "felt needs" for pleasure 'change.' It is "Self" and its "lust" for pleasure that is the initiator of 'change.'
It is the father's/Father's authority of "doing right and not wrong," according to his/His commands, rules, facts, and truth that prevents, i.e., inhibits or blocks the child from being his "self," requiring him to control, discipline, humble, deny, and die to his "self" daily in order to do the father's/Father's will, requiring him to reprove, correct, rebuke his "self" when he does wrong—the child having to discipline his "self" since the father/Father can only discipline the child, persuading the child to discipline his "self" in order to become mature, making him resistant to 'change,' i.e., unadaptable to 'change,' especially rapid 'change.' According to dialectic 'reasoning' instead of the child's nature creating the antithesis condition or tension and conflict between the child and the father/Father, it is the father's/Father's authority that creates the antithesis condition instead, preventing, i.e., inhibiting or blocking the child from being his "self," engendering a guilty conscience (the father's/Father's voice), i.e., "neurosis" in the child when he does wrong, i.e., acts "normal," i.e., is his "self" i.e., desires 'change.'
The only way the child can overcome the antithesis condition, according to dialectic 'reasoning,' created by the child when he obeyed the father/Father, i.e., when he submitted his "self" to the father's/Father's authority, is either to kill the father/Father, remove him/Him from the environment (making it "good" again) or negate the father's/Father's authority in his feelings, thought, and actions, as well as in his relationship with others and the world, perceiving him as being "irrational," i.e., out of touch with his "feelings," i.e., his carnal (natural) desires of the 'moment,' and therefore "irrelevant," of no worth when it comes to what is important in life, i.e., pleasure. Therefore, according to dialectic 'reasoning,' unless both are accomplished, i.e., the father's/Father's authority is negated in the child's feelings, thoughts, and actions, as well as in his relationship with others and the world (in the child's thoughts and actions) and the father/Father and his/His authority is negated in society (in all children's thoughts and actions), the father's/Father's authority will persist, either in the child or in society, "repressing" the child, i.e., preventing him from being his "self," "alienating" him from the other children of the world, preventing, i.e., inhibiting or blocking them from being their "self", i.e. "of and for their self" as well. The cure for "neurosis," in the child and in society, is the negation of the father's/Father's authority in both the child and society at the same time, engendering a world "of and for self," i.e., of and for 'change.'
"The individual may have 'secret' thoughts which he will under no circumstances reveal to anyone else if he can help it. To gain access is particularly important, for precisely here may lie the individual's potential for democratic ... thought and action in crucial situations." (Theodor Adorno, The Authoritarian Personality) The key to 'change,' i.e., 'liberating' "self" from the father's/Father's authority is dialogue. The dialectic process is based upon dialogue, which initiates and sustains 'change,' i.e., 'justifies' the child's nature, i.e., the child's desire for pleasure, i.e., that which is of the world as well as his dissatisfaction with restraint, i.e., the father's/Father's authority, i.e., his/His commands, rules, facts and truth which inhibit or block 'change,' i.e., which prevent the child from being his "self." Dialogue begins with the child. It 'liberates' the child from the father's/Father's authority, 'liberating' him from the father's/Father's "Because I said so," "It is written" response to his "Why?" (the child's effort to bring the father/Father into dialogue) in response to the father's/Father's commands and rules which got in the way of the child's desires of the 'moment' in the past. Without beginning with the child, i.e., with dialogue, the father's/Father's authority is retained. Georg Hegel wrote: "The child, contrary to appearance, is the absolute, the rationality of the relationship; he is what is enduring and everlasting, the totality which produces itself once again as such [once he, i.e., his "self" is 'liberated' from the father's/Father's authority so that he can be his "self," i.e., as he was before the father's/Father's first command, rule, fact, or truth came into his life, i.e., carnal, i.e., of the world only]." (Georg Hegel, System of Ethical Life) Hegel's "particular" is the child dialoguing ('reasoning,' being "reasonable," "rational," "practical") with his "self," discussing his desires and dissatisfactions of the 'moment' with his "self." Hegel's "universal" (what all children have in common, the basis of common-ism) is that all children dialogue with their "self," talk to their "self" about their desires (for pleasure) and their dissatisfaction (with restraint). By bringing all children together in a consensus environment, encouraging them to sharing their opinion, i.e., their desires and dissatisfactions of the 'moment' with one another—with no "put down's," i.e., no father's/Father's commands, rules, facts, and truth, i.e., "negativity" getting in the way—the children are able to find common ground with one another and thus "build relationship" with one another upon what they have in common, i.e., their common "self interests" of the 'moment,' that which is of their nature only and the world which stimulates it—which is ever 'changing.'
In this way, through the dialoguing of opinions to a consensus, a so called "new" world order of 'change' can be initiated and sustained, negating the "old" world order of the father's/Father's authority with its preaching and teaching of commands and rules to be obeyed (as given) and facts and truth to be accepted as is (by faith), which prevents, i.e., inhibits or blocks 'change.' As Karl Marx wrote: "The philosophers have only interpreted the world in different ways [established their opinion as the only right way, thus inhibiting or blocking 'change'], the objective however, is change [the process of 'change,' i.e., the consensus process itself]." (Karl Marx, Feuerbach Thesis #11) All children are philosophers, thinking about how the world "is" (subject to their parent's authority), how it ought to be (subject to their carnal desires of the 'moment') and how it can be (once the parent's are gone or they no longer have authority).
The problem comes, according to dialectic 'reasoning,' when children finally get "their way," insisting upon everyone else obeying them, restoring the father's/Father's authority in society. Without the facilitator of 'change' "helping" children overcome (negate) the father's/Father's authority in them (the fear of judgment, engendering a "guilty conscience" in them for doing wrong or for disobeying/sinning), they can not 'liberate' their "self" or others from the affects the father's/Father's authority has had upon them—insisting that others "do right and not wrong" according to their desires (standards), preventing, i.e., inhibiting or blocking 'change.' Therefore, without the process of 'change,' i.e., dialogue, i.e., the child's desires and dissatisfactions being expressed, i.e., 'liberated' from the father's/Father's authority, 'change' can not be initiated and sustained. Have you heard the word 'change' recently? It all rests upon the carnal nature of the child, i.e., his desires and dissatisfactions, i.e. his love of pleasure, i.e., love of self and the world and his hate of restraint (and the restrainer), i.e., the father's/Father's authority.
Karl Marx and Sigmund Freud had Hegel's agenda of 'liberating' the child from the father's/Father's authority in common—so that they could be their "self," as they were before the father's/Father's first command, rule, fact, and truth came into their life, carnal, "of and for self" and the world only. Karl Marx wrote: "Once the earthly family [where the children are subject to the earthly father's authority, preventing 'change'] is discovered to be the secret of the holy family [where man is subject to the Heavenly Father's authority, preventing 'change'], the former [the traditional family with the father's "Do what I say or else" authority system] must itself be annihilated [vernichtet] theoretically and practically." (Karl Marx, Theses On Feuerbach #4) Sigmund Freud wrote: "'It is not really a decisive matter whether one has killed one's father or abstained from the deed,' if the function of the conflict and its consequences are the same [the father no longer insists upon his children obeying him, doing his will over and therefore against their nature, 'discovering' common ground with them, according to "human nature" only, instead]." (Sigmund Freud in Herbert Marcuse, Eros and Civilization)
By merging the two, Marxism (society) and psychology (the individual) in a "group psychotherapy," i.e., facilitated environment (classroom), where all the children can dialogue their opinions to a consensus, children and society can be 'liberated' from the father's/Father's authority, negating the father's/Father's authority from the face of the earth, so that man can be "of and for" his "self" only, instead. Carl Rogers wrote: "Prior to therapy [before dialoging their opinion—how they "feel" and what they "think" in the 'moment,' and coming to a consensus with others on what is "right" for the 'moment,' negating the father's authority (judgmentalism, prejudice, i.e., restraint) in their feelings, thoughts, and actions and in their relationship with one another in the process] the person [the child] is prone to ask himself 'What would my parents [my father/Father] want me to do ?' During the process of therapy [dialogue] the individual [the child] comes to ask himself 'What does it mean to me?'" [creating a "new" world order of children (in adult bodies) who—thinking they own everything they see that brings them or should bring them pleasure (as the women and Adam did in the garden in Eden)—praxis "Make me 'feel' good and I will listen to you," i.e., 'justify' my carnal desires of the 'moment,' i.e., affirm me and my carnal nature or I will "unfriend" you.] (Carl Rogers, on becoming a person: A Therapist View of Psychotherapy)
The master facilitator of 'change' helped two "children" 'justify' their "self," 'liberating' their "self" from the "Father's" authority in a garden in Eden (Genesis 3:1-6)—negating the Father's authority (Hebrews 12:5-11) and the guilty conscience for doing wrong (Romans 7:14-25) in their feelings, thoughts, and actions, and in their relationship with one another and the world, turning against the Father's authority, i.e., refusing to repent in the process.
"Ye are they which justify yourselves before men; but God knoweth your hearts: for that which is highly esteemed among men is abomination in the sight of God." Luke 16:5
"And for this cause [because men 'justify' their "self," i.e., their love of "self" and the world, i.e., their love of pleasure more than God] God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie [that pleasure is the standard for "good," instead of doing the Father's will]: That they all might be damned who believed not the truth [in the Father and in His Son, Jesus Christ], but had pleasure in unrighteousness [in their "self" and the world]." 2 Thessalonians 2:11, 12
"Then answered Jesus and said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise." "I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me." "For I have not spoken of myself; but the Father which sent me, he gave me a commandment, what I should say, and what I should speak. And I know that his commandment is life everlasting: whatsoever I speak therefore, even as the Father said unto me, so I speak." John 5:19, 30; 12:47-50
"Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me." John 14:6 "Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself [his "self"], and take up his cross [be willing to endure the rejection of men], and follow me." Matthew 16:24 "For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother." Matthew 12:50 "And call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven." Matthew 23:9
"Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven. But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven. Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me:" (Matthew 10:32-37)
"For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world." 1 John 2:17
"From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members? Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not. Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts. Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God." James 4:1-4
"Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience: In the which ye also walked some time, when ye lived in them." Colossians 3:5-7
Your "self," it is what keeps you out of Heaven. "Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you." 1 Peter 5:6, 7
© Institution for Authority Research, Dean Gotcher 2017