"Win - Win."
The Marxist Waltz.
"Win - win" is the Marxist Waltz. By taking two steps forward, pushing an issue until people squeal, then taking one step back so they can "feel" like they have won, the Marxist can waltz (march) people across the room to his desired outcome, all the while with the people thinking that they have won, i.e., are in control. While their "win" means freedom from restraint, i.e., control over their own lives, the Marxist's" "win" is freedom to use them as he wants, i.e., control over them, without restraint, i.e., with no accountability for what happens to them in the end.
"Prior to therapy the person is prone to ask himself, 'What would my parents want me to do?' During the process of therapy the individual come to ask himself, 'What does it mean to me?'" (Carl Rogers, on becoming a person: A Therapist View of Psychotherapy)
If someone "builds relationship" with you, based upon common "self interest," i.e., love of pleasure and hate of restraint, i.e., "What can I get out of this for me," they will "own" you in the end. While you might join with them to get control over your life, i.e., get what you want, when you want it, along with 'liberation' from the restraints of the "past," i.e., the father's/Father's authority, with their "help" (and your cooperation) they will control you in the end, using you for their own pleasure and gain, casting you aside when you no longer serve their purpose (pleasure) or get in the way—doing what they said they would never do in the beginning, i.e., insisting or giving you the impression that they would be with you through thick and thin, i.e., not judging you or condemning you back then.
When you set aside, i.e., suspend the truth, as on a cross, in order to satisfy your "self interest," including your desire for the approval of men, those who you join with, having the same "self interest," i.e., love of pleasure and hate of restraint, will suspend you on a cross when and if you ever change your mind, i.e., realize that you were wrong (and therefore they were wrong), repent, and follow after the truth instead of them.
Like you and a "friend" looking for gold, "self interest" sounds good until gold is found. Then you had better watch your back because your "friend's" "self interest" could cost you your life (thinking what they could do if they had all the gold).
This is how "Win - Win," i.e., the Marxist Waltz works. You can see people dancing to it all around you today, 'shifting' their focus (and the purpose of life) from doing right and not wrong according to established commands, rules, facts, and truth, i.e., the father's/Father's authority to their "feelings," i.e., their love of pleasure and hate of restraint—in education, in the workplace, in entertainment, in the media, in government, and even in the "church."
"And through covetousness [your "self interest"] shall they with feigned words [plastic words, Gr., i.e., doublespeak, i.e., saying one thing while meaning another, i.e., giving you what you want to hear in order to gain your trust] make merchandise of you [turn you into "human resource" so they can use you for their own pleasure and gain]." 2 Peter 2:3
It is how the charlatan works, finding common "self interest" with the farmer's daughter, i.e., dissatisfaction with the father's restraints, gaining her trust, running off with her to use her for his carnal pleasure and gain, then casting her aside when he no longer needs her, i.e., when she gets in the way, i.e., when she is a burden. While she "wins," being 'liberated' from her father's restraints (and protection), the charlatan "wins" as he uses her for his own carnal pleasure and gain, not being responsible for (caring) what happens to her in the end.
"There is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death." Proverbs 16:25
"The heart is deceitful above all things [thinking pleasure is the standard for "good" instead of doing the father's/Father's will], and desperately wicked [hating whoever prevents, i.e., inhibits or blocks it from enjoying the carnal pleasures of the 'moment' it desires]: who can know it?" Jeremiah 17:9 You can not see your hate of restraint as being evil with your "self," i.e., your love of pleasure in the way, 'justifying' your hate, blinding you to the deceitfulness and wickedness of your heart. Without the father/Father and his love, which includes restraint, all you have is your hearts desire, i.e., "lust" and those who will use it for their own gain.
"We know how to influence the ... behavior of individuals by setting up conditions which provide satisfaction for needs of which they are unconscious, but which we have been able to determine." "If we have the power or authority to establish the necessary conditions, the predicted behaviors [our potential ability to influence or control the behavior of groups] will follow." "We can choose to use our growing knowledge to enslave people in ways never dreamed of before, depersonalizing them, controlling them by means so carefully selected that they will perhaps never be aware of their loss of personhood." We can achieve a sort of control under which the controlled though they are following a code much more scrupulously than was ever the case under the old system, nevertheless feel free. They are doing what they want to do, not what they are forced to do. That's the source of the tremendous power of positive reinforcement—there's no restrain and no revolt. By a careful design, we control not the final behavior, but the inclination to behavior—the motives, the desires, the wishes. The curious thing is that in that case the question of freedom never arises." (Carl Rogers, on becoming a person: A Therapist View of Psychotherapy)
This is what "win - win" is really all about. You will loose your soul if you follow down its pathway. It is not how far down the pathway you have gone. It is that you are on it. Like a pig pen, one step on (in) it and you stink.
For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels." Mark 8:36-38
"And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." Hebrews 12:5-11
© Institution for Authority Research, Dean Gotcher 2019